Where is the "higher law"?
While contemplating which law school or public administration Ph.D. program to apply to, I had a radical conversion: I asked myself, is it law you really want to study? What about a "higher law"? My answer was quickly and obviously in favor of the "higher law", but I couldn't accept it: the idea of me attending seminary was just plain incongruous. Going to seminary just didn't consciously "flow" from the experience of my life at the time. So I procrastinated and just plain put it ("higher law") out of my conscious mind. For years.
Then, I had the opportunity to read scripture in a non-denominational Christian church, and I spoke the words aloud from Jeremiah 31:33-34. "I will put my law in their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. No longer will a man teach his neighbor, or a man his brother, saying, 'Know the LORD,' because they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, declares the LORD. For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more."
The seminary question came back, but I still couldn't imagine myself there -- somehow that was just too large a leap. But continuing to ignore the question brought no peace, but just the opposite.
Apparently the anguish of my soul and mind that I was experiencing subconsciously, began to show on my face, and good people started to reach out to me. They started something; I began to open myself more to others, to reach out to more and more people. It was then, through this sharing in community, that I received multiple, undeniable confirmations and signs of support which have enabled me to enter the seminary. It is through these others that I really came to know my own heart; I thank them for their support.
I know now and I have known for a long time -- since I was a very young girl -- that there is a "higher law" and that it is written on our hearts. I look back on my life thusfar and see it as preparation for this admission: there is nothing more important than transforming/equipping myself to stand and be a witness to the "higher law" -- any time, any place. There are plenty of opportunities; I hope to address many in this blog. Stay tuned.
3 comments:
Your story reminds me of something my uncle once said. I asked him why he changed careers from mathematics (precise, right answers) to becoming a Presbyterian minister. He responded, "I decided to pursue what is true, instead of what is merely accurate."
That's such a great quote, Tom. I'm going to steal that from you if you don't mind ... I'm always trying to explain to people that there's a difference between truth and fact. I think your uncle's statement might help clear things up a little bit.
I find stories like this of finding our calling really powerful. Here is a link to a sermon about calling from my church
http://www.all-souls.org/sermons/mp3/06.12.03HearingOurCall.mp3,
I hope you like it. Sharon
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